Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Liara: Lair of the Shadow Broker

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You know what? Let's light this candle. Let's go after the Shadow Broker. Quickly, to Illium!

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Come for the art, stay for the writing, that's what I say.

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Hey, all of you remember Feron!

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(I bring Tali on this mission just for the pure Mass Effect 1 Brosquaditude of the situation. Who am I kidding, I'm the only person on the Internet that loves Miranda anyway.)

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gurl~

Pretend asari turn dark blue when they get all ~bothered~, okay? Just pretend for me. I don't think Bioware ever specifies, and damnit, I'm working in MSPaint here!

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This happens in the damn game, by the way. It's a game play thing, they just want to give you some time to get your shit together before you go help Liara, but it's still odd: why the hell do we take separate cars? Does Shepard smell?

It gets even worse when you find out what happens next.

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Fuck! Someone tried to shoot Liara! Tela Vasir was hunting for clues, but she's an incompetent NPC, so it falls upon Shepard to do police work. Again. All right, let's search Liara's apartment for shit.

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You know what's funny? My husband knows, like, off the top of his head where Liara got her degree. How much of a big damn nerd can you be? He's going to come home from work and tell me what it is, too. I'm not going to look it up, just to fuck with him.

Eventually:

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... I guess TVs work on USB drives in the future. Odd, you'd think they would have streaming video.

Shit, you guys, did Bioware correctly predict Netflix tanking?

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But! We'll have to do it next time.

4 comments:

  1. Liara's degree comes from the same place as Chakwas' brandy.

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  2. You're not the ONLY person on the internet who loves Miranda... but there might just be the two of us.

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  3. I'd like to chime in with some Miranda love, too! :D

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  4. I'm a little late to this particular party, but I also think Miranda's awesome. She's by far my favorite squadmate in ME2, and my love interest of choice for male Shepards (I've played both genders). That last part may be due in part to the fact that I have a crush on Yvonne Strahovski, and think she looks hot as a brunette.

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