Javik confirmed for hero of Mass Effect Andromeda, pass it on.
At this point, you can talk to Anderson, EDI or Tali. Anderson advances the plot, though, and I think y'all know me well enough to know that I'll need time to yell at EDI.
Come at me, it's true!
Yo so the first time I saw this scene, I was like,
Because this shit can happen:
Because sex boat.
But good news, if you're doing the do with either of them, they thankfully just reminisce instead.
So hey, guess what activates if we go into Shepard's cabin!
I was wondering if I could make that shot work. I, uh, couldn't.
Granted, I can't make any shot work.
The nice thing about the Garrus sex scene is that Bioware didn't animate them having sex. The others ... sorry, those are two computer generated bodies of polygons rolling around. (Can you tell I don't play Bioware games for the love stories?)
Last time I went through and showed you what we didn't win, but here's the thing: all of these scenes are, uh, real damn similar. I love Mass Effect 3, but it needed more dev time. The sex scenes are one area where you can tell Bioware was rushed.
Still, here's our not-Garrus sex pals:
Liara plays with Shepard's helmet a bit.
Kaidan drinks. I frequently forget about Kaidan.
Traynor's is the best, but we'll have to revisit it. You'll see why.
Really, I could start subbing anyone in.
Wanna get weird?
Let's go.
First, let's discuss friends. Does the following ever happen to you?
I'm not kidding, I don't sit and watch very well. I think that's why I find video games so much more appealing, at least I'm doing something while I'm watching. (I'd love to watch more anime, because I think there's a mirror universe somewhere where this blog is me drawing out anime episodes poorly instead of video games poorly.)
Also, if we're hanging out, I'd like to ... I don't know, talk to you? Do stuff with you? Make a fucking memory? Not just stare at the damn screen.
And of course, no one ever wants to watch something I would actually want to watch anyway.
What I'm saying is, I'm glad Shepard has the same problem.
... isn't Fleet and Flotilla a video game in the Mass Effect universe?
I think Fleet and Flotilla is supposed to be some sort of take on Buffy, but I'm not sure, because like I said, I don't sit and watch stuff real often. I decided to make it Quarian Dr. Who instead.
...
Oh my GOD. Okay. Let's workshop this scene.
Stuff that is good:
I mean, this is fucking hard to watch. You get second, third, fourth and fifth hand embarrassment from Tali singing.
This has to be the most diplomatic line in the trilogy, and this is a trilogy with actual diplomats.
Let's all agree that there's only one good singing scene in video game history.
Moving on, Vega and Cortez want to come over.
mspixel.jpg
Jesus Christ, this game is horny. I'm not sure how we can outdo ourselves here.
Switching gears, a story for you. Let us travel back in time, briefly, to when Citadel first came out. I was working on completing it, but I had to work slower than other Mass Effect nerds, because there was, of course, MSPixel to draw.
This kept happening:
I'm not kidding, there were so many of you that felt I needed the next scene in my life. Thank you, by the way, I love it when you all talk to me.
(PS, if you need dem links, go follow me on Twitter or Tumblr.)
What was the scene?
This was the scene.
EVERYONE GET AMPED: THIS IS THE 400TH CITADEL DLC IMAGE!
You know the damn game gets hornier than this? And I'm not even talking about the sex scene.
Urdnot Wrex, sir, you are a liar! We all know you're not the fittest krogan at all!
You know, I almost did Final Fantasy 13 instead of Mass Effect. I could have been trying to remember the difference between fal'cie and l'cie right now instead of drawing a bag of nut ice.
