Saturday, December 28, 2013

SATURDAY POST: Merry Christmas, Husbando~!

I've had Husbando's~ Christmas present finished forever. I can post it now that he's gotten it!

Husbando told me once that he wanted something with "all different colors of Mega Mans on it." K, can handle:

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All that was was my mad quilting skills and some t shirt transfers. I had to make the different colored Mega Mans in GIMP, but as you all know, I'm a professional digital artist, so that was piddling shit. Happy Christmas, Husbando~!

Friday, December 27, 2013

Jus' Folks

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On occasion in Mass Effect 3, you'll be invited to the Citadel to piss around with various NPCs.

... the good news is that this is more of a beginning of the game thing than an end of game thing, so the plot does pick up somewhat after we do a few of these.

Since we're talking about NPCs, here's the thing about Miranda in ME3: if she says to do something? Do it. Fast. Just trust me, when Miranda says jump, you're going to ask how high.

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This first time, though, she doesn't have much for us to do. That's okay, let's go see if there's another Mass Effect 2 regular hanging around the Citadel.

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Oh, shit, hi Kelly!

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... that sounds like a joke, but you actually can tell Kelly to change her look so that Cerberus won't find her. I know it's the renegade choice, but trust me, do it.

Not too far from Kelly is Garrus! Apparently he helps the turian refugees when he's not busy calibrating the Normandy guns or assisting Shepard on missions.

... do you not just hate people like that?

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Anyway, moving on, we --

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This is in the game, I'm not being a shit.

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Hey, let's see who's in the bar.

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I'm not being a shit, again, this is also in the game, the horniest game there is.

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Fuck you, Vega.

Anyway, we're also here to see Ashley in the hospital. When we enter Huerta Memorial Hospital, though, we get to see an old friend:

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(You know there were fangirls who were mad over this? His first line in Mass Effect 2 was "I am dying," it's not like Bioware exactly sprung that one on us.)

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Speaking of Ashley, we probably need to go peek in on her now.

HEY! Pay attention to this next bit, this is, like, actual factual plot that's about to happen.

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NEXT TIME: The next people to talk to cause unsafe blood pressure spikes, you've been warned.

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Die Hard Ain't Shit

And now, to the atrium of Grissom Academy.

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This is one of the harder sections of the game. It's mostly hard because people do it too early. (Including me. I totally forgot and marched straight into Grissom.) But still, you will die in the Grissom atrium. Like, freals.

Also, most people bring EDI into Grissom, because this is the first mission where she's available. EDI will not help you in the atrium. This is what she does:

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EDI also has a power called decoy, where she makes a second EDI, which does nothing except put a second ass in your face.

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As you go along Grissom, you'll discover some kids who are trying to defend themselves against Cerberus.

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If you didn't do the Mass Effect 2 DLC, Kahlee promptly comes over the loudspeaker and makes fun of the kids. But we DID, so:

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Shepard comes across an Atlas pilot who isn't watching his back none too good, so she does the natural thing:

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You can use the Atlas in the next combat area! I mean, you don't have to? But why would you not.

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Finally, we can get to the shuttle!

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.... it's .... it's just faster to assume that any time there's a cut scene, Shepard is in cool down.

Anyway, let's all pile into the shuttle and fly away from Grissom.

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... yeah, so. The game gives you this choice by the way. Hey, I love kids? I don't trust most kids to handle hard candy, you sure as hell can bet that I'm not going to trust them to save the damn galaxy. Fuck no. Bitch, I have a house to worry about. You put those kids on the front line, they'll be too busy playing Pokemon or falling over or some shit to actually do anything.

I don't even know if that's the paragon or renegade option? I think I'm missing out on some war assets, and also this is my no1curr face.

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Kahlee comes over the speaker in the shuttle and says some bullshit, to include:

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Time to Space Skype! Hi, Anderson!

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Hey everyone, that's how I celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior, by describing old people sex. Happy holidays!