Friday, September 27, 2013

Now Leaving Vancouver, Population: Reaped

Holy crap, you all, I had the worst time getting MSPaint to work. You want to talk about being shot in the knees.

When we last left our heroes, we'd just hit some bay in Vancouver. It may be Vancouver Bay. Is that a place?

 photo me348_zpse89a1087.png

Just in case you've forgotten, this shit is still going on:

 photo me349_zps50ecacd5.png

 photo me350_zps25fb9bbb.png

Anderson is more concerned with getting in contact in the Normandy, which sort of backfires on him and Shepard.

 photo me351_zps5cbfc08c.png

... or front fires. Whatever it takes to make the pun.

 photo me352_zpsfca48e20.png

Our Shepard falling off shit count is up to 2 by now.

 photo me353_zps6a63a7ac.png

All right, defend the guys. That shouldn't be a --

 photo me354_zps172168dd.png

 photo me355_zps09c6912e.png

AWW HELL NAW.

The tutorial level wants you to shoot shit, I think, but damnit, that's not what we're about right now! Vanguard uses charge! We should be charging things!

Fine. I pulled all the husks out of the way, only to hear:

 photo me356_zpsca04ee64.png

Thankfully, the game gives us back charge in this fight.

 photo me357_zps1c63abde.png

Here's the coolest thing about Mass Effect 3. Vanguards have a new ability. After they charge, they can, well --

 photo me358_zps60599bf8.png

Meet nova! Charge's best friend!

Nova causes Shepard to jump in the air and slam a bunch of biotic shit down, thus killing whatever charge didn't get. Nova drains your shields, but by the time it goes off, charge is recharged, and charge brings your shields back up once it hits, if you spec it right.

Leaving you free to be all,

 photo me359_zpsc9de8060.png

Vanguards are literally invincible.

vanguard = best class

don't deny

Anyway, if you play Mass Effect 3 right, the screen looks like this:

 photo me360_zps998c9303.png

Let's all take a moment to look at that photorealism. Let's just soak it in.

Anderson will then ask Shepard to hold some husks off until the Normandy can extract them. I've heard a few varying things about this fight. I don't know what the ending condition is. It's not on a timer. I've heard it lasts until Shepard runs out of ammo, that sort of feels right.

Anyway, once whatever it takes happens:

 photo me361_zps2bda7367.png

How the hell did the Normandy just fly past all the reapers, not to mention the buildings, and pull up that close to the bay? I mean, I know it's not a huge ship, but it's still got to be taking the top off a building or something.

"Hey, Bean, it doesn't get in that close!"

 photo me362_zps07746226.png

It gets in close enough for Shepard to jump on board!

Hey, next to Vega: everyone wave hello to Ashley's new character design! She let her hair out of her bun and got blue armor. The Internet got mad, of course it did, because the Internet always gets mad over everything. I don't know, I kind of like her blue armor, but I also like Ashley, which is like the least popular opinion a Mass Effect nerd can hold next to "Miranda is one of my favorite characters" and "Hey, let's all fuck Jacob!".

 photo me363_zps19326a74.png

 photo me364_zps2b17d3fd.png

 photo me365_zps6f41336c.png

Shepard's tags have taken a weird path through the three games, do we all realize that? Some merc stole them off Shepard's dead body, Liara swiped them from there, and I guess Anderson pocketed them when he and Vega took Shepard off the Normandy.

... Liara and Anderson are creepy. Fuck.

Does that tie everyone up?

 photo me366_zps305ee8fd.png

Oh, right! The little nameless kid! Welp, he's getting on a shuttle, he should be good.

 photo me367_zps134ea585.png

Yup, totally --

 photo me368_zpsf91572fe.png

Um. Okay, that's something.

 photo me369_zpsa05fc4e9.png

Shepard's visibly upset by the little boy's shuttle, because she's killed piles of men before on her way to get a soda from the corner store. Wait, hold on, what?

Don't think too hard about this, this is obviously the last time we're going to talk about that kid. Instead, let us focus on the last scene of Mass Effect 3's opening, which is the reapers reaping the ever loving fuck out of Canada.

 photo me370_zps2cf445cd.png

 photo me371_zps5428577c.png

 photo me372_zpsc33aecd7.png

 photo me373_zpsbbc97531.png

Well?! She's got a point! Anderson is the first NPC who lives through the tutorial level and doesn't become a squadmate.

... there've been a few that have lived and become a squadmate immediately for their trouble, such as Dawn Star, Kaidan, and Amy Rose. Amy Rose is a Bioware character, don't you kind of hate knowing that? Either way, Anderson just totally achieved a first, here.

 photo me374_zps9ddebdb1.png

8 comments:

  1. Could you please at some point make .pdfs of your posts by games and books? (Ie: A .pdf per game and book). I'm sure I'm not the only one who wants to read this offline. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Wow, I never thought about doing that. Do you know if Blogger will export? I can futz with OpenOffice if it won't, I guess ...

      Would you want Mass Effect 1 as its own pdf and Mass Effect 2 as its own, or each entry separate? I guess I could do it as each mission seperate too ...

      Delete
    2. I don't think there is a proprietary .pdf tool for it and I can only find a handle of third party programs, (almost all payware). This is a free one but requires you to export the blog as an .xml, (instructions are provided):http://www.blogbooker.com/blogger.php
      Each: Game, novel, and comic as there own .pdfs please! Alot more tidy.

      Delete
  2. Vanguard is so much fun in ME3, I wouldn't even need a gun if they didn't make me.

    ReplyDelete
  3. i am without words. You take letters on a keyboard and turn them to sweet melodies.

    ReplyDelete