Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Shepard Gets Mad

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"Bean, you're lying, Kai Leng doesn't really email Shepard to gloat." Oh it happens.

"Bean, you must be exaggerating, it surely must sound more mature than what you've got there." You're going to learn some day that I make very little up, and then you're going to get sad.

Point being, the asari councillor would like to space skype with us.

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... yo, I'm not sure how future etiquette works, but I think "your planet is fucked and you're all gonna die" is a message best delivered in person ... ?

At least Shepard's not going to space text that one.

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I think we're supposed to believe that this is the first time Shepard fucked up. Except ... how did she fuck up? She didn't get the data, but it wasn't her fault unless maybe you count being so damn fat that you crack the floor to a millennia old temple.

Real talk, if the asari wanted to keep their planet and their species, they needed to play ball way the hell back in Mass Effect 2. If they had The Data That Could Make Everything Work, the time to bring that up was when Liara brought it up to them. Maybe they could have saved Earth and Palaven. Maybe when the reapers came around to Thessia, there would be human and turian troops at the ready.

But naw, you don't get to not play nice and then keep all your toys. I don't feel sorry for the asari, not even a little bit. Eat reaper laser you nasty shits.

Anderson also calls.

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FUN FACT: From this point forward, 50% of Anderson's lines at least are about being born in London.

And now, welcome to one of my favorite scenes in the entire game.

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I love it so much when Shepard is pissed. Usually there are bodies involved.

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... has anyone ever seen Liara broke a shadow? I cannot name one time in the entire Mass Effect canon where she provides intel. Children, consider who I am: not only did I read the books, I took notes on them and drew them. If Liara ever did a shadow brokerey thing, I'd know about it.

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1 comment:

  1. No "t" in Wesley Crusher. Sorry, accurate Trekkin's kinda my thing.