It's time to talk to all our squadmates, but they mostly say generic stuff. ("Wow, you sure did fall through a fish tank!")
Except maybe Vega.
"Hey Bean, why do you hate Vega?"
Anyway, let's go hang with Liara. Liara did all the hard work for us.
Did you ... did anyone catch this?
Does the Inquisitor fuck everything that moves?
Liara et all discuss the layout of the casino. It's mostly technobabble, you're not missing too much here.
(I'm not even sure why they ask EDI. If Tali's out because of tech ... I mean ... come the fuck on.)
I hate cutting here, because this is a little short, but this section doesn't divide as nicely. Obviously Bioware should be more considerate of MSPixel.
I've been off my game most of last week and all of this week.
Husbando~'s been extremely sick, you see.
Even though that is a real live actual factual thing said to me by him, I'm being a little shitty, because he's actually been quite a bit sicker than that. They actually had to put me on a compliment of drugs to keep me from dragging his disease and pestilence to work. (I work with children in the public schools, and some of my homies have severe medical needs, so I was sweating bullets.)
Point being, caring for him hasn't left me with much time, but I miss you all, so. Let's talk and enjoy shitty art together. What have you been doing?
I've been playing Captain Toad Treasure Tracker. It's kind of perfect for my current situation because I can play it a little bit at a time. Also, Captain Toad? You guys, Captain Toad. I love that tubby little bastard. I'm also madly in love with Toadette, she's my new favorite Mario homie.
We call the game Captain Toad's Fat Stacks over here.
The Mario Party amiibos come out tomorrow! Who's ready? Who's hunting? I'm going after work! I want a Toad. They only made the non-ranking Toad (so far!), but I still want him, because he is deeply presh.
I imagine there's three types of people who will be hunting tomorrow.
1. Me, and similar nerds.
2. Real children.
3. The actual Internet.
That's the best Pinkie Pie, Mountain Dew and fedoras I can draw.
I heard that (Mario Party 10 spoiler, if there is such a thing} Toadette is unlockable. I'm hoping there's a wave 2 with Toadette in it. I will bowl motherfuckers over to get my Toadette amiibo. I'll bowl you all over like it was fucking Ness. Speaking of, believe right now that I will cut a motherfucker for Ness.
I went looking for Mass Effect news for us to all enjoy, but there is none! Apparently Bioware announced recently that they'll be announcing the ME4 release date and showing hella footage at E3, but that's not news. I could have told you that. I could have told you that by pulling it out of my ass. Hey, I bet Nintendo shows off Zelda footage too. I bet Microsoft shows off a cover shooter. I bet GameExplain releases a video 15 minutes later talking about the dancer in the cover shooter.
I did find this cool Mass Effect video, please enjoy:
I'm super exited for Splatoon. It was at PAX East, but I can't find much information on it! That's so weird. Enjoy this little scrap, I guess.
I know this is dumb, but I'm excited to customize my squid girl. I usually don't care about that sort of stuff. In Animal Crossing, I just want a non-ugly shirt and then I wash my hands of it.
Finally, bunnies, because bunnies are the best thing ever.
Last we left Shep and pals, we were all at the used car lot, about to be rescued.
Which is totally going to happen, by the way, Shepard's going to 100% get rescued.
So anyway this is going on:
art
One complaint about Mass Effect 3: people were sad that certain characters were missing from the playable roster. Mass Effect has a bazillion great characters anyway that Mass Effect 3 makes every effort to kill off, so it was kind of surprising to see so few playable home boys. Especially since there were so many playable characters in Mass Effect 2!
There was, however, one particular character that people missed more than the others.
Try and guess before scrolling down.
Yeah, naw, that happens, Wrex drops out of the fucking sky and starts punking bitches.
Thankfully, Joker and Brooks roll by to pick Shep et all up.
Anyway, let's reconvene in Anderson's apartment.
THAT'S WHAT ALL CAT PEOPLE SOUND LIKE.
Glyph is, of course, Liara's droid, if you've forgotten.
Now it's time for us to ... hmm. You know, I'm actually not sure. Stumble around and see where the hell we are, I guess. This is a totally new part of the Citadel that we've landed on.
Rimshot.
Along the way, Shepard finds a pistol with a silencer that she's supposed to use to take out bad guys undetected while she sneaks her way to the used car lot.
And if you actually believe that, I have some lovely ocean front property on Tuchanka to sell you.
VANGUARD LYFE
One of the complaints levied against Mass Effect is that the squad banter in Dragon Age is better, so Bioware has the technology just, you know, lying around. Like I said, I haven't played too much of Dragon Age, so I can't speak too much to that one. But, Bioware kindly upped the amount of squad banter in Citadel for us.
So I've been told, the squad banter changes between you and your love interest also changes in Dragon Age, so Bioware threw it in for us here, kindly.
If your main squeeze is Anders, doesn't he say "of course, my love!" every time you give him a direction in battle? That sumbitch weirds me out.
The first caller is always your love interest, and if you don't have one, it'll be Liara. I have no idea what determines Caller Number 2, and Google tells me nothing. It's probably the squadmate you use the most.
Let's roll up on that car lot.
Another complaint against Mass Effect, and one we'll probably visit a few times as Citadel goes on, was that there wasn't enough interaction between Shepard and her love interest.
But ... this line? This line.
Besides ... champ, those are her dress blues. She wears those every day. That's weird. You're weird.
The only nice thing I can say is that the girls will also perv on Shepard.
That's the nicest thing I have to say. "The girls are also fucking perverts." Mass Effect is the horniest fucking game there is.
Shepard and Garrus need a door opened to the rest of the car lot, and a volus hiding behind some glass (presumably the owner) can open it for them.